Raks and Happy Birthday

No this isn't a blog about rak's birthday or mine. It's about a birthday party that I can never forget and I am putting it down for posterity, in case I get stricken by Alzheimers and forget where I lived.

Raks was almost two years and had precisely four teeth, which she used quite prodigiously to bite the TV remote, the milk bottle and myriad other things that I forget now (good thing that I am writing the rest. I probably have early signs of alzheimers). I remember being very reluctant to breast feed her, as her teeth were sharp enough to draw blood (Twice ouch!).

And we were invited to a 'birthday party'. Raks at that age, knew that birthday parties meant bouncing castle, ice cream, blowing of candles and of course return gifts (they better be good!). I still remember the cutesy white coloured frock that she wore with small buds and florets. She looked so angelic and lovely that I got ready for the compliments that were going to come my way.

The party was for a five year old boy and there was a car shaped cake. Raks went around checking out the entertainment; bouncing castle - we had to tempt her out of it with an ice cream, after she bounced on it for half hour, missing the cake cutting ceremony (Giving gifts for others were not her finest moments even then!). She got a tele tubbies tattoo, done on both her shoulders and had four spoons of ice cream before she ran off.

Left to polish off the ice cream, I sat down watching her, as she went around with girls of her size and suddenly there was a piercing scream and I ran towards the scene. One of raks's instant friends was crying pointing fingers at my innocent daughter. With my motherly instincts up, I picked up raks and asked what the matter was?

"She bit me." said the girl

"No. Rakshah wouldn't do any such thing." I declared but the witnesses were unwavering in their statements. So I took the offender back to the seat but I have never been able to get raks to sit in one place, unless the idiot box was on. Soon she meandered off and this time with a couple a boys her size. And I followed her. She joined the boys at the bouncing castle and soon were safely bouncing with a cute chubby boy. I felt indignant at the girls, who had condemned her and my heart melted when I saw her giving the cute little boy a kiss and within a second, all the gooey feeling was replaced with horror. In the guise of a kiss, she bit him yet again.

"Bah bah bah...."

Oh God! I quickly yanked her off the bouncing castle before anybody could notice. Thankfully, my husband joined me and I berated him for leaving me alone to deal with his 'vampirish' daughter. We resolved to keep a close eye on her but even as we discussed, she had slunk off after a cute girl. With my husband on the watch force, we tracked her down fast before she could deliver the killer kiss.  But by then, word had spread around and parents who had cute little boys and daughters were on their guard to pick up their kids, if raks so much as looked at them.

And to my mortification, I heard conversations where, mothers were warning their kids to stay away from raks. With this and more, I was ready to leave but my husband was half way through dinner and the hostess was insistent that I have dinner. With two ice creams and three balloons I sat down with her in a corner keeping her away from all the kids.

I was itching to get to my computer and research about why kids bite other kids, fearing what the results would throw up. What if it is a disease ending in 'iasis'? Will this require therapy, counseling? What if they throw her out of the school for biting her classmates?

The end of the day, raks was very happy. She got two goody bags of presents from the hostess, which was all very well because we didn't grace any party, birthday or otherwise for the next one year. (Thankfully she got over the habit within a year. Phew!)

Rak's toys and buyer's remorse

I know I have been absent since new year. Thanks to Vaikunta Ekadasi, Pongal, Kannum Pongal, Maatu Pongal, native place (husband's) temple festival and finally rak's birthday, my itinerary was full. Here is a blog that has been pending so long...


Buyer's remorse is nothing new to me. I could relate sagas about toys that we bought for raks in our enthusiasm and the way we repented for it in leisure.

Music Fish

A musical fish. Now how cute is that. It  rushes through the floor with a melodious music flashing its tail, this way and that with some bright lights. We imagined, raks playing with it serenely sitting in the middle of the play area watching it move around (while I got some work done on my laptop). Fat chance. In the first place, the music that seemed low toned in the shop blared its heart out at home. And raks's reaction reminded me of Jaws movie, where people scrambled out of the beach fearing a shark attack. And raks trampled on hanuman, krishna, hanuman (number 2), cooking set oven (that survived with a dent), grandfather's arm before she settled on my lap to escape from it.

We parents are a worst lot I think. We still wanted our money's worth from the toy. So the musical fish became the boogeyman to threaten her, if she confiscated our mobiles, vegetables, utensils, grandfather's watch or my books. After about ten days or so, the fish broke its tail and ended up in the bag that read 'can be resurrected if raks created trouble'

Bow and Arrow

Now I have nothing against bow and arrow. I have played it with it, during the hey days of epic serials on DD. Raks insisted that she loves the bow and arrow and wanted to learn archery. My husband immediately commissioned me to check out archery academies in the city, hoping that this plastic bow and arrow, might jumpstart raks's lifelong sporting career as an archer.

She got the bow and arrow but instead of the plastic target that came along with it, she aimed at our rear ends, delivering with unerring precision, arrow after arrow. After being pelted with a barrage of arrows, the bow and arrow vanished into the bag that read 'confiscated and dangerous'.

Fishing Set

And do not ever take your child into a toy store, especially when you are buying a birthday gift for somebody else. You will just end up buying yet another toy for your darling.

That's what happened that day. I was late for a birthday party and had to enter a toy store with an excited raks in tow. And I had to make eyes at the shop assistant to make him understand that I want to buy a barbie set. And I hoped that he would understand all the unsaid things that I dare not voice (please gift wrap this barbie set and give me the bill) And raks in the meantime was trying to sit on all the cycles that were on display and was probably planning to run away with them. But there is a golden rule that says, you cannot enter a toy store without buy anything for raks. I told her that she needs to pick something that we do not have. (What was I thinking?) And she picked the fishing set.

It had one of those magnets in the end, while there were a couple toy fishes that were supposed to float around and raks could deftly pick up them up from the ground with the fishing hook.  It worked fine for a few days, barring a few accidents when we were pelted on the head by the overenthusiastic fishergirl.

And one day, a delegation from the temple had come to formally invite my father-in-law for the temple festival that we host every year. And the friendly priest engaged raks in conversation, even while she was catching the fish.

"What are you doing?"

"I am catching fish. I will make fish fry for you."

"Narayana!"

While we hushed and shushed her, the priest looked grim and looked around suspiciously. I don't even want to voice what he must have thought. And that was the end of the fishing saga and the entire set got slotted into a bag that read 'not to be played in public toy bag'

And the most recent acquisition of hers is a boxing set, which my husband insisted on getting for her. So far, its been working fine, as raks has abandoned the punching bag and has been using her father as one. Will update that saga sometime in future.